Thoughts about giving gifts this season
As we step into December, the month of Christmas, I have been thinking about the energy exchange involved in buying and giving Christmas gifts. I have always been a person who spared no expense in giving a Christmas gift; I took pride in buying things that I felt people would like. I made good money, and it all felt right to me. This year, while I build my fledgling company, I do not have access to this energetic currency I once took such pride in. Without a free flow of money, I have been thinking a lot more about it. Thank goodness necessity is the mother of invention ;)
I was recently listening to the Reclamation Radio podcast with Dr. Kelly Brogan, and she had on guest Ryan Schwartz, the money shaman. The description of the episode includes a quote from Schwartz: “money’s desire to be healed and liberated through relationship with its stewards.” This was a fascinating take on money – it wants its relationship with us to be healed? The more I noodled it around, the more it made sense. Think about any energy, which I define in the traditional sense – the ability to do work; if we idolize it, put it on a pedestal, hoard and stymy its flow, it will become unhealthy. Consider fame and celebrity; if we idolize a person, devote all of our attention to it, that celebrity retreats as it all becomes too much. As we fetishize money, it can start to elude us too.
With all of that said, we have the ability, if we want, to make choices that heal our relationship with money. The first step is in lifting up the value of the other energetic currencies we have access to, and there are many. This holiday season, whether you are flush with cash or not, consider what it would be like to value the other extraordinary energies you have and give them away instead.
A guide to building a money-free holiday gift list:
Take stock of your currencies: If it feels right, take an inventory of the energies you have in great supply. I’ll give you my examples. I have more time now than I did as a clinical pharmacist, and I can share this with the people I love. I have a strong physical body – I didn’t always feel this way, but I do now, and I can put my good body to work. I have my attention. My dear friend, Ben has this quote from Simone Weil illuminated on his wall: “attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” I am capable of being curious about another person, of asking them questions, of genuinely wanting to be with them in a way that is not distracted. I have words and the ability to write. I pushed this away for a long time, but now I embrace the fact that I can write and put my words to use in honoring those I love. I also information about both the medical field and the world of the witch. I can share what I know with other people.
Other energies that I have received as gifts are space – my dad gave me space when I was a young adult, and it was because of that gift that I am able to have a relationship with him now. I have been given permission, beauty (it feels so good to get attention from an attractive person!), confidence (for someone to give their confidence in me is invaluable), humor, charisma, youth, wisdom, ability to play music or cook or sew or bake, kindness, and the list goes on.
What are your top 5 energetic currencies right now?
Take stock of your allies: in addition to your own innate energies, what else do you have to work with? Do you have art supplies, an instrument you can play, pen and paper, a computer, a Cricut machine, plants you can propagate, natural materials outside, possessions you already own that someone else would really love to receive, access to beautiful places, like the mountains, woods, playgrounds, beach, a home or yard. I have a shawl my niece loves to wear every time she comes to my house – I could give it to her, and it would mean more than something new I could buy. I could take my mom to the mountains and go for a hike, and she would rather do this with me than anything else.
Consider the recipient: What does this person need or want? How grateful am I that my nieces just love spending time with me and my husband – an easy compass to determine a gift for them, and my husband would really love the mental off-load of not having to doing laundry; I can give this as a gift. Maybe you know someone who is struggling to make time to pick up their kids from school and could use support there. Maybe you know someone who is starting a business and could benefit from word getting out about what they do.
Alchemy: I might consider alchemizing my time, attention, and the kid crafts I have in my house and turn it into a sleepover with my nieces (which may also be a gift for their parents). Or I might alchemize my time, attention, words, and computer and turn it into a story or poem for my mom. How will you combine your energies and allies and turn them into gold?
Sell it: this is where you infuse your gift with love, the greatest energy of all. Instead of saying, “mom, I couldn’t afford to get you something this year, so I am taking you snowshoeing,” say, “mom, I love you and appreciate you so much, and this year, I am taking you to abc trail on xyz date for a snowshoeing adventure. We will set intentions and goals and channel our energy into strong minds and bodies for the new year.” If the gift you are giving is filled with love, the recipient will feel it. Know your worth, know other the energies you have are just as valuable as money, and likely more so!
Receive: Just as important as giving a gift is receiving a gift in gratitude. When someone gives you a gift that doesn’t have money at the root of the exchange, honor it with your gratitude. If someone gives you a gift that you are not thrilled about, perhaps take a moment to ask them about it. There could be a whole beautiful story of love and thoughtfulness behind the gift, but the giver just didn’t know how to sell it properly. We get to decide what’s valuable, and we have the capacity to heal our relationship with money by lifting up the value of everything else, one intentional energetic exchange at a time.
What energy would your dog most appreciate this Christmas?