Witchy little risks 11-20

One of my greatest realizations to come of the last week and a half is the importance of and absolute joy in being part of a community. I have stopped giving myself credit for attending networking events as witchy little risks because they have become more and more comfortable over time, and part of the reason is my feeling of belonging in a community of people also hoping to connect, learn, and grow. Each time I prepare to enter one of these networking events, I feel the butterflies in my stomach – I still prepare for judgment and scrutiny of my nontraditional field of work, and each time, I am pleasantly surprised at how folks meet me with curiosity and kindness. We are all doing our best to live in our most authentic way and how awesome that we can help each other as we go?

I’ve had a couple of moments stand out this past week, some of them weren’t exactly risks, but they were impactful nonetheless. My friend, Erika, was donating her time to cook a community supper for the nonprofit Mill City Grows and invited me to join. Mill City Grows is an incredible organization. When I worked for the Lowell Community Health Center, I would refer my patients to MCG at every appointment. They are a farm in Lowell, and they work hard to provide locally grown produce to the community of Lowell, through both CSAs and mobile food markets. Many of my patients were able to access these mobile markets and pay with EBT or use a flex benefit from their insurance – kudos to both MCG and MassHealth managed care plans for seeing the value in helping folks access healthy food as preventive medicine! Ultimately, the dinner was incredible, and not just because Erika’s ratatouille, polenta, and apple crisp were nourishment for my very soul, but because we were there with folks from around Lowell who were proud to be there, celebrating this work and the community they belong to.

Full disclosure, though, I goofed. I thought the dinner was a full week before it actually happened, and I drove the 30 mins to Lowell before I realized my blunder. When I discovered my mistake, I saw the opportunity to visit another of my favorite places in Lowell – Life Alive. Life Alive is a small chain of vegetarian restaurants serving deliciously healthy meals, and the first location was right there in Lowell. As I waited for my food to be ready, I walked around the restaurant – it is full of local artists’ work, flyers advertising open mic nights, comedy shows, and concerts, a free little library of books you can read while you sit there enjoying your food, and other little touches that create such a place of warmth.

I stood for a while in front of this sign outlining the ways to build community and got a little misty eyed. I don’t know if it was the deep resonance with my soul calling, or a little bit of grief that it took me so long to realize that this is what’s most important to me, or a deep sense gratitude for someone else building this space and making these intentional little choices to draw people closer together, but I was feeling the feels for sure.

Lowell is doing so much right – in this city, people care about each other, and when we have this, we have everything. We will figure out how to make the planet our community, and when we do, we’ll have won it all.

But on to my witchy little risks!

#11 – Attend the Radical Healing festival and ask people to be interviewed  – At one point, just attending a radical healing festival would have been a risk. At first blush, it seems counter to the goals of a clinical pharmacist, but at this stage, I am confident mainstream medical care and alternative medicine can very much go hand in hand. The point is, attending an event like this is no longer a risk for me, so I had to up the ante to make it count. I went into this festival with the goal of meeting healers doing their amazing and unique work and to find at least 2 who would let me interview them for a podcast. There were so many lovely healers living their dream and sharing their passion with others. There were Jillian and Catherine from Flote, a salt water sensory deprivation experience, there was Rob, the evolutionary astrologist, there was Nicole, a pioneer in creating her own healing modality based on her love of the Greek classics, there was Allison, the herbalist who turned her youthful affection for pot into a full-fledged love story with plants and all they offer for healing, and so many other brilliants folks. I was lucky enough to surpass my goal, and four folks are willing to let me interview them! Stay tuned…

#12 – Network with primary care providers at wellness expo –  Ok, this was a Merrimack Valley Chamber of Commerce event, and as I mentioned, I am not allowing myself to count these as risks, so to be bold, I set out with a goal to find two providers or providers’ offices whom I could pass my card along to for potential referrals down the line. In the end, there were no PCPs or primary care practices at the expo; this really hit home that providers’ offices are not struggling to find patients. In fact, I think most provider offices are struggling to keep up with the needs of the community they serve. The lovely result of this expo was meeting Leigh and Nerissa. Leigh was an accountant who was feeling unfulfilled and decided to earn a certificate in herbalism and Nerissa was a hair stylist who was tired of the vibe at salons she had worked for in the past, a sort of ultra-competitive, unsupportive culture. They found each other, and they took a big bold leap to open the brilliant Ivory and Onyx, a salon and wellness center where you can find healing and beauty from the inside out. Meeting them was like a homecoming. I won’t spoil too much of their story, as I’ll definitely be chatting with them in greater depth very soon, but suffice it to say they are AMAZING, brave, brilliant, witchy beauties.

#13 – Meet with business mentor – There is a free service sponsored in part by the US Small Business Administration called SCORE that connects people starting their own businesses with mentors who have experience and a willingness to share what they know. I signed up and I had the pleasure of meeting with Diane and Kevin – 2 mentors! The risk was putting myself in a position to be laughed out of a Zoom call by folks who had business success, while I have trouble figuring out how to use Instagram and have the word “witch” in my business name. Again, I was filled with gratitude that they were willing to let me share my ideas without judgment and offered encouragement and suggestions for structure. Again, I learned that people really like to help each other.

#14 – BNI 30 second commercial – After attending a few MVC networking events, I have also been invited to attend a couple of BNI meetings. I had no idea what BNI was until about 2 weeks ago, but it is a large for-profit business networking platform with chapters all over the world. The idea is that you have a unique seat in a chapter, like maybe you are a roofing company – you will be the only roofing company represented in that chapter, and through a series of mandatory weekly chapter meetings, continuing education modules, one-on-one meetings with other members, referrals for the other members, and some other things, you build your client base and your business. The nature of the meetings is very positive and empowering, and there are little opportunities for members to grow their skills apart from just networking. On a rotating basis, members do presentations for each other and every week they share a 30 or 60-second commercial, which is lovely practice condensing your message and sharing with a group. As a guest, I was also able to, on the spot, give my own 30-second commercial. Lots of butterflies in the tummy there, but a terrific way to grow J

#15 – Meet about selling insurance – Through my networking adventures, I met Marc, who saw my enthusiasm for my work, but also recognized it may take some time to build a large enough client base to generate revenue. He suggested we meet for coffee to discuss how we might be able to come up with some ideas. I knew what Marc did, and I suspected he wanted to talk to me about doing the same – he sells supplemental health insurance plans to employees of small businesses. It was a productive meeting, and I set off to learn more insurance sales as a possibility, ever trying to lead with curiosity. I’m so grateful for the support of kind new acquaintances along this journey.

#16 – Diving into Scottish culture – For the past 3 years, my best friend, Katie, and I have gone to the Highland Games at Loon Mountain in NH. This event is near and dear to Katie, having Scottish heritage and fond memories of her dad participating in the heavy athletics and hurling the tree trunk they call a caber around. We have our routine, specific places we like to go and things we like to do. This year, my risk was to immerse myself more fully in the Scottish culture. Rather than get a hamburger, I tried a Scotch egg, and rather than take the gondola ride up to the top of the ski slope, we learned how to say sweet nothings to each other in Gaelic. In case you are curious, the Scotch egg was a soft-boiled egg coated in sausage and then battered, deep-fried, and served with sausage gravy on top. Not surprisingly, it was delicious. Our adventures in Gaelic were well worth the departure from our routine too – our teacher was a kind and earnest librarian from Vermont who had us all singing together in Gaelic by the end. This whole festival was another terrific example of the power of community. Not everyone who attends the Highland Games has Scottish heritage, but for the duration of that festival, we are absolutely all Scottish.

#17 – Hug a stranger goodbye – While at the Highland Games, we went to a dinner to celebrate Cape Breton heritage and music, and I was lucky enough to sit next to one of the performer’s wife. She was from Prince Edward Island and was an absolute delight to talk to. Her witchy little risk of late was to learn how to row, and this was particularly exciting because it was a lifelong wish she was manifesting now in her late 60s. At the end of a night full of clapping along to the fiddle and chatting about our gardens, I decided to give her a hug goodbye. I know this seems like a small thing, but I’ve found that most of my life I have held in the hug. It’s almost always my instinct to go in for a hug – I love hugs– but I think I’ve come to believe it's bad or wrong or an invasion of people’s personal space or something. Perhaps it’s all the years of teaching where they tell you never to touch the kids or the years in the medical field where every touch that isn’t part of a physical exam is a lawsuit waiting to happen. I decided in this moment not to worry and just lean in and trust my instincts. The hug was well-received, and it’s allowed me to revisit my thoughts about holding in the hug. I think there is room to follow our intuition here, and if our gut tells us yes, going for the hug may be a pretty powerful and lovely way to connect. Of course, not everyone wants the hug, but I think we can be discerning rather than have a big NO as the default.

#18 – Skipping risk – My husband and sister-in-law had been away for a week and a half on a canoe trip, and they returned home this day. I made the decision to skip a witchy little risk to be fully present with them and hear their stories. The risk for me was perhaps in prioritizing my family over the work I have assigned myself with these posts. I came from a career where the work is the priority, and charting until late into the evening was the rule and not the exception. As I create this new work to be in alignment with my inner compass, I am ever mindful of the desire to find balance, to find a way to honor my work, to give my family the love and attention they deserve, and to find time to recharge my own batteries and nourish my body, mind, and soul. I am also aware of the fear I have of losing momentum, of taking a break never to come back again. I think we often live in these zones of absolutes, being all in or all out. I saw it with folks I worked with – sometimes following a strict diet, and sometimes having no intention behind food choices at all. We are allowed to live in shades of grey; we are allowed to have nuance. No one is going to punish us for taking a step off the path and then coming back to it. If they do, then perhaps we needed to find a new path anyway.

#19 – Teach first class – This was a huge moment for me – I hosted my first class that was not for friends or family, and people actually came. It feels so audacious to think I have something to offer others that doesn’t have its value vetted by some degree or certificate. What I am offering is myself, my own journey, my own thoughts, and for someone to take a leap and come along with me still feels surreal. I had two lovely students who were willing and ready to participate and take some little risks. I am incredibly grateful to them and to the universe for drawing us together, and I am thrilled to work with them again J

#20 – Call my paternal grandmother – This was the biggest risk so far. When I was 18 years old, I invited my paternal grandmother to my high school graduation, and she didn’t come or call. It turns out she and my mother had had a conversation about my dad (they had been divorced a good 17 years at this point) that didn’t go the way my grandmother wanted it to, and she separated herself from me as a result. I didn’t really have the bandwidth as an 18-year-old to figure out what to do with all of this, and time continued to pass. Now, almost half of my life later, I am in a position to hold space for my grandmother. I can appreciate her trauma having been born to a mother who had lost her entire family as a teenager to Spanish flu and to have lost her own oldest sister to a violent crime in her youth. We all have pain. The call with my grandmother was a window – we’ll see each other in person next month. I am eager to hear her story and understand better where she, and by extension I, came from. Uncovering this history may be the witchiest thing I do!